Understanding Wedding Invitation Etiquette
Wedding invitations are more than just a way to inform your guests about the big day; they set the tone for your celebration and serve as the first impression of your wedding. Whether planning a formal black-tie affair or a laid-back garden party, understanding the nuances of wedding invitation etiquette can ensure your invites are beautiful and respectful.
As your resident expert on all things pen-and-ink, allow me to introduce myself. I’m Victoria, your go-to calligrapher based in Bergen County, New Jersey. With years of experience in the fashion industry, I now specialize in creating custom wedding invitation suites, heirloom-worthy commissions, and on-site calligraphy for live events. My passion is turning love stories into works of art, one perfectly penned letter at a time.
Here’s your comprehensive guide:
1. Timing Is Everything
When it comes to wedding invitations, timing is critical. Sending your invites too late might leave guests scrambling to RSVP, while sending them too early could result in forgotten details. Here’s the ideal timeline:
Save the Dates: Send these 6-8 months before the wedding. For destination weddings, aim for 8-12 months in advance.
Invitations: Mail your invitations 8-10 weeks before the wedding. For destination weddings, give guests at least 12 weeks.
RSVP Deadline: Set the RSVP deadline 3-4 weeks before the wedding to allow enough time for final headcounts and seating arrangements.
2. Addressing Invitations
Properly addressing your invitations shows respect and sets a formal tone. Here’s how to do it:
Outer Envelope: Include titles and full names (e.g., "Mr. and Mrs. John Smith").
Inner Envelope: This is where you can be less formal (e.g., "John and Mary").
Guests and Children: Clearly indicate who is invited by writing their names on the envelope. If children are welcome, include their names under their parents’ names.
3. Wording Matters
The wording of your invitation should match the tone and formality of your wedding. Here are key elements to include:
Host Line: Traditionally, whoever is hosting (often the bride’s parents) is listed first. For modern weddings, both families or the couple themselves can be listed.
Request Line: Use phrasing like "request the honor of your presence" for religious venues or "request the pleasure of your company" for secular locations.
Details: Include the date, time, venue, and reception information.
Dress Code: If there’s a specific dress code, mention it at the bottom (e.g., "Black Tie Attire").
RSVP Information: Provide a reply card or RSVP details, including a deadline and any dietary requests.
4. Managing RSVPs
An organized RSVP process is key to avoiding last-minute surprises. Here’s how to streamline it:
Include Pre-Stamped RSVP Cards: Make it as easy as possible for guests to respond.
Offer Online Options: Provide a website or email for tech-savvy guests.
Follow Up: Politely follow up with anyone who hasn’t responded by the deadline.
5. Handling Plus-Ones
Plus-one etiquette can get tricky, but clarity is your best friend:
Who Gets a Plus-One: Typically, married, engaged, or long-term couples should be invited together. For single guests, it’s up to your discretion.
Be Clear: Use the guest’s name and their plus-one’s name on the invite. If you’re not offering a plus-one, address the invite to just the individual.
6. Special Considerations
Every wedding is unique, so you may need to navigate some specific scenarios:
No Kids Policy: If your wedding is adults-only, politely indicate this on the invite or your wedding website (e.g., "We respectfully request no children at the celebration").
Destination Weddings: Include travel information and accommodations with your invite or direct guests to a wedding website.
Gift Preferences: Avoid mentioning gift registries on the invite itself. Instead, include this information on your wedding website.
7. Sending Thanks
Good etiquette doesn’t end with the wedding. Send thank-you notes within three months of your wedding day to show your gratitude for your guests’ attendance and gifts.
Conclusion: Make It Personal
While wedding invitation etiquette provides a helpful framework, your invitations should ultimately reflect you and your partner’s personalities. Add thoughtful touches, like custom calligraphy or a heartfelt message, to make your invitations unforgettable. With a little attention to detail, you’ll create an inviting start to a day your guests will cherish forever.
CREATING A COHESIVE WEDDING INVITATION
Hi! I am Victoria and thank you for being here.
I am your go-to calligrapher based in Bergen County New Jersey, specializing in wedding invitation design, custom calligraphy commissions, and on-site calligraphy and engraving services for events. With a background in the fashion industry, my passion for calligraphy has evolved into a thriving business, creating heirloom artwork and personalized invitations for clients.
Want to work together? Or just say hi! You can find me here
https://sunsetscribe.com/contact-njcalligrapher-sunsetscribe
Below are some of my tips for creating wedding invitations.
Creating a cohesive wedding invitation suite is all about ensuring that each element works together harmoniously to reflect the couple's style and the wedding's theme. Here’s how you can achieve this:
1. Choose a Central Theme or Style
Theme: Whether it’s vintage, modern, rustic, or whimsical, having a clear theme guides all design choices.
Style: Decide on a calligraphy style that matches the theme—elegant script, playful brush lettering, or minimal serif fonts.
2. Color Palette
Select a color palette that reflects the wedding’s colors. Use these consistently across all pieces in the suite—invitation, RSVP card, details card, etc.
Consider the balance between neutral tones and accent colors for a sophisticated look.
3. Consistent Typography
Use the same fonts throughout the suite to create a unified look. Mixing two or three fonts can work, but they should complement each other.
Ensure the hierarchy is clear with headings, subheadings, and body text in different styles or weights.
4. Matching Paper and Printing Techniques
The type of paper (e.g., cotton, vellum, kraft) can greatly affect the suite’s feel. Choose one that fits the theme.
Consider printing techniques like letterpress, foil stamping, or digital printing to add texture and depth.
5. Illustrative Elements
Include consistent illustrative elements, such as florals, monograms, or venue sketches, across the suite.
These elements can tie together different pieces while adding a personal touch.
6. Cohesive Layout and Spacing
Maintain a consistent layout structure with similar margins, spacing, and alignment across all pieces.
This uniformity ensures that the suite feels like a single, cohesive unit.
7. Envelope Design
Match the envelope design to the invitation. Consider an envelope liner with the same pattern or color palette.
Address the envelopes in a calligraphy style that matches the invitation for a polished finish.
8. Personalization
Add personal touches like a custom monogram, wax seal, or ribbon that can be used throughout the suite.
These details make the invitation feel unique and special.
9. Consider Practicality
Make sure the suite is practical—sizes should fit easily into envelopes, and the layout should be easy to read.
Include clear instructions or details where necessary, like on the RSVP card.
10. Packaging
The way you present the suite when it's received matters. Consider how each element will be unpacked and ensure it’s a delightful experience from start to finish.
By carefully curating each of these elements, you can create a wedding invitation suite that not only looks beautiful but also tells the story of the couple and sets the tone for their big day.
Trends in Wedding Invitations for 2025
As we look forward to 2025, wedding invitations are evolving to reflect new trends in design, personalization, and sustainability. Here are the top trends that are set to make wedding invitations stand out in the coming year:
1. Sustainable and Eco-Friendly Materials
Couples are increasingly prioritizing sustainability in their wedding planning. In 2025, expect to see more wedding invitations made from eco-friendly materials such as recycled paper, plantable seed paper, and biodegradable materials. These options not only reduce environmental impact but also add a unique touch to the invitations.
2. Minimalist and Modern Designs
Simplicity continues to reign supreme with minimalist designs that emphasize clean lines, elegant typography, and ample white space. Modern couples are opting for invitations that are sophisticated and uncluttered, reflecting a less-is-more aesthetic.
3. Bold Colors and Unique Palettes
While pastels and classic white remain popular, 2025 will see a rise in bold and vibrant color choices. Deep jewel tones, rich earth tones, and unexpected color combinations will make wedding invitations more eye-catching and memorable.
4. Interactive and Multifunctional Invitations
Innovative couples are looking for ways to make their invitations more interactive and multifunctional. This includes invitations that double as keepsakes or functional items, such as pop-up designs, invitations with QR codes for RSVPs, or those that can be transformed into decorative items.
5. Handcrafted Elements and Artisanal Touches
Handcrafted details add a personal and intimate feel to wedding invitations. Look for invitations that feature hand-painted elements, custom illustrations and calligraphy, wax seals, and hand-torn edges. These artisanal touches reflect the couple's personality and add a bespoke quality to the invitations.
6. Luxurious Textures and Finishes
Texture plays a significant role in creating a sensory experience with wedding invitations. In 2025, expect to see invitations with luxurious finishes such as velvet, foil stamping, letterpress, and embossing. These textures add depth and sophistication, making the invitations feel truly special.
7. Personalization and Customization
Personalization continues to be a key trend, with couples opting for custom monograms, bespoke artwork, and personalized messages. This trend extends to incorporating cultural and personal elements that tell the couple's unique love story.
8. Vintage and Retro Inspirations
Nostalgia will influence wedding invitation designs in 2025, with vintage and retro styles making a comeback. Invitations inspired by the elegance of past decades, such as Art Deco, mid-century modern, or 70s boho, will add a touch of timeless charm.
9. Themed and Destination-Inspired Invitations
Couples hosting themed or destination weddings will reflect their event's location or theme in their invitations. This could include incorporating elements like tropical motifs for a beach wedding, rustic designs for a countryside celebration, or cultural symbols for an international destination.
Conclusion
The trends in wedding invitations for 2025 are all about personalization, sustainability, and unique design elements. Whether you're planning an eco-friendly celebration or looking to make a bold statement with your invitations, these trends offer plenty of inspiration to create invitations that are as memorable as your big day. Let’s work together!
Wedding Stationery Timelines: When to Book and Send Out Your Invitations
Properly timing your wedding stationery is crucial to ensure everything runs smoothly leading up to your big day. Here’s a comprehensive guide on when to book your stationer and when to send out your various wedding stationery items, based on the timeline of your wedding.
Hi! I am Victoria and I am happy you found my page!
I am your go-to calligrapher based in Bergen County New Jersey, specializing in wedding invitation design, custom calligraphy commissions, and on-site calligraphy and engraving services for events. With a background in the fashion industry, my passion for calligraphy has evolved into a thriving business, creating heirloom artwork and personalized invitations for clients.
Want to work together? Or just say hi! You can find me here.
https://sunsetscribe.com/
Booking a Stationer
To ensure you have ample time for design, revisions, and printing, it's recommended to book your stationer 8-12 months before your wedding date. Here's a month-by-month breakdown:
January Wedding: Book by April of the previous year.
February Wedding: Book by May of the previous year.
March Wedding: Book by June of the previous year.
April Wedding: Book by July of the previous year.
May Wedding: Book by August of the previous year.
June Wedding: Book by September of the previous year.
July Wedding: Book by October of the previous year.
August Wedding: Book by November of the previous year.
September Wedding: Book by December of the previous year.
October Wedding: Book by January of the same year.
November Wedding: Book by February of the same year.
December Wedding: Book by March of the same year.
Save-the-Dates
Save-the-date cards give your guests ample time to make travel arrangements and plan for your wedding.
When to Send: Send save-the-dates 6-12 months before the wedding.
Destination Weddings: For destination weddings or during peak holiday seasons, send save-the-dates closer to the 12-month mark.
Invitations
Wedding invitations should be sent out to your guests with enough time for them to RSVP and make necessary arrangements.
When to Send: Mail invitations 6-8 weeks before the wedding date.
Destination Weddings: For destination weddings, send invitations 10-12 weeks in advance.
Here’s a timeline for mailing invitations based on your wedding month:
January Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-November to early December of the previous year.
February Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-December to early January.
March Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-January to early February.
April Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-February to early March.
May Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-March to early April.
June Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-April to early May.
July Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-May to early June.
August Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-June to early July.
September Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-July to early August.
October Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-August to early September.
November Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-September to early October.
December Wedding: Mail invitations in mid-October to early November.
RSVP Deadline
When to Set: Set the RSVP deadline for 3-4 weeks before the wedding date to give yourself enough time to finalize the guest count and seating arrangements.
Day-of Stationery
This includes programs, menus, place cards, and other stationery items needed for the wedding day.
When to Order: Order day-of stationery 2-3 months before the wedding.
When to Finalize: Finalize details such as guest list and seating chart 3-4 weeks before the wedding.
Sample Timeline for an August Wedding
Planning your wedding stationery involves a series of steps to ensure everything is prepared and sent out in a timely manner. Here’s a detailed timeline for an August wedding:
August Wedding
12+ Months Before the Wedding
August (Previous Year): Begin researching and booking your stationer. This allows ample time for designing and revising your invitations.
10-12 Months Before the Wedding
October-November (Previous Year): Start working on save-the-dates. If you’re planning a destination wedding, send these closer to the 12-month mark.
6-9 Months Before the Wedding
February (This Year): Finalize the design of your save-the-dates and have them printed.
February-March (This Year): Send out save-the-dates to your guest list.
6 Months Before the Wedding
February (This Year): Start designing your wedding invitations. Confirm all details, such as venue, timing, and RSVP information.
4-5 Months Before the Wedding
April (This Year): Finalize and order your wedding invitations. This gives you time to review and make any necessary changes before printing.
3 Months Before the Wedding
May (This Year): Send out your wedding invitations. This gives guests plenty of time to RSVP and make travel arrangements if necessary.
6-8 Weeks Before the Wedding
June (This Year): Confirm and order your day-of stationery, including programs, menus, place cards, and any other printed materials needed for the wedding day.
3-4 Weeks Before the Wedding
Early to Mid-July (This Year): Set the RSVP deadline. This gives you enough time to follow up with any guests who haven’t responded and to finalize your seating chart and catering numbers.
Mid-July (This Year): Finalize your guest list and seating arrangements. Make sure all day-of stationery is printed and ready.
1 Week Before the Wedding
Late July to Early August (This Year): Assemble any welcome bags or final touches that include stationery items.
Wedding Day
August (This Year): Ensure all day-of stationery is delivered to the venue and set up as planned.
Summary Timeline
Booking Your Stationer
August (Previous Year)
Save-the-Dates
Design: October-November (Previous Year)
Send: February-March (This Year)
Wedding Invitations
Design: February (This Year)
Order: April (This Year)
Send: May (This Year)
Day-of Stationery
Confirm and Order: June (This Year)
Finalize Details: Early to Mid-July (This Year)
Print: Mid-July (This Year)
RSVPs
Deadline: Early to Mid-July (This Year)
Final Preparations
Assemble Welcome Bags: Late July to Early August (This Year)
Set Up at Venue: Day Before or Day Of the Wedding
Conclusion
Staying organized and adhering to this timeline will help ensure that all your wedding stationery is prepared and delivered on time. This allows you to focus on other aspects of your wedding planning and enjoy the journey to your special day.
Behind the Scenes: Setting Up for a Live Calligraphy Event
I would love to share the process of preparing for a live calligraphy event, from selecting materials to setting up the workspace.
Live engraving events are a fantastic way to add a personalized touch to any occasion, whether it's a wedding, corporate event, or brand activation. They not only showcase your craftsmanship but also create memorable experiences for attendees. Proper preparation is key to ensuring everything runs smoothly. Here's a step-by-step guide on how to set up for an on-site live engraving event. I will be running through this list as I prep for On Site Events.
Hi! I am Victoria and I am happy you found my page!
I am your go-to calligrapher based in Bergen County New Jersey, specializing in wedding invitation design, custom calligraphy commissions, and on-site calligraphy and engraving services for events. With a background in the fashion industry, my passion for calligraphy has evolved into a thriving business, creating heirloom artwork and personalized invitations for clients.
Want to work together? Or just say hi! You can find me here:
Here are some of the things to consider to prep for a live calligraphy event:
Understand the Event Details
Before diving into the setup, gather all the essential information about the event. This type of information I would gather during the email process with the brand or client to find out logistics and guest count. I would also want to know the guest count so I could calculate how many pieces I would need to finish hourly if I was hired for 4 hours (which is my minimum)
Event Type and Theme: Knowing the event type (e.g., wedding, corporate, retail) and theme helps tailor your setup and engraving styles.
Guest Count: Estimate how many items you’ll be engraving to ensure you have enough supplies and if you need to hire another engraver or calligrapher for the event if the budget allows.
Venue Specifications: Understand the venue layout, available space, lighting, and any restrictions. This also helps with the flow of the activation in order to keep your table busy but not overwhelming.
Plan Your Equipment and Supplies
Ensure you have all the necessary tools and materials for live engraving:
Engraving Tools: High-quality engraving pens, depending on your method, engraving burrs, burr lubricant.
Engravable Items: I bring my sample bottles so that clients can see my style but typically the venue provides what is being engraved and that is planned ahead of time.
Protective Gear: Safety glasses, gloves, mask and any other protective equipment required for your tools.
Backup Supplies: Extra tools, replacement parts, and a back up engraver.
Drafting Pencil/Marker: Stabilio white pencil, chalk marker to draft the clients personalization
Alcohol: To clean the surface of the glass
Create a Portable Workspace
Design a workspace that is functional, attractive, and easy to transport:
On Site Kit: something that is easy to carry, think roller or backpack and is professional. Most likely all black.
Lighting: Portable lighting to ensure you have enough visibility, especially if the venue lighting is dim.
Display Setup: Arrange your tools and materials neatly. Use displays to showcase samples of your work and attract guests. I like to use acrylic pen holders to hold my rub and buff and qtips, etc.
Personalize Your Setup
Make your setup visually appealing and aligned with the event theme:
Branding Materials: Desk sign with your name, company and “calligraphy + engraving” or your title. You can keep business cards in your kit and pass out to anyone that asks.
Signage: Clear signage to explain your services and any instructions for guests.
Prepare for Interactions
Engaging with guests is a crucial part of live engraving events:
Greeting Guests: Have a friendly introduction prepared to welcome guests and explain the engraving process.
Customization Options: Offer a variety of fonts, designs, and engraving styles for guests to choose from.
Order Forms: Use order forms or post its to collect information and personalization details.
Conduct a Test Run
Before the event day, do a complete test run of your setup:
Practice Setup and Teardown: Ensure you can set up and dismantle your workspace efficiently.
Test Equipment: Check all your tools and equipment to make sure they are functioning correctly and charged.
Time Management: Practice engraving to gauge how long each piece takes, helping you manage time during the event.
Pack Strategically
Organize your materials for easy access and transport:
Storage Containers: Use labeled containers or bags to keep your tools and supplies organized.
Checklists: Create checklists for packing and setting up to ensure nothing is forgotten.
Transport Arrangements: Plan how you’ll transport your equipment, whether it’s by car, or public transport.
Arrive Early
Give yourself ample time to set up before guests arrive:
Early Arrival: Arrive at the venue early to allow for unexpected delays and to ensure a calm, organized setup.
Coordinate with Event Staff: Communicate with the event organizers and staff for any last-minute instructions or adjustments.
Engage and Enjoy
Once everything is set up, focus on creating a memorable experience:
Interactive Demonstrations: Perform live engraving demonstrations to attract and engage guests.
Customer Interaction: Chat with guests, answer questions, and ensure they are satisfied with their engraved items.
Collect Feedback: Encourage guests to leave feedback or reviews to help improve your services.
Conclusion
Setting up for an on-site live engraving event requires careful planning and preparation. By understanding the event details, organizing your equipment, and creating an inviting workspace, you can ensure a successful and enjoyable experience for both you and your guests. Remember, the key to a great live engraving event is not just the quality of your work, but also the interactions and memories you create for your guests. Happy engraving!
Checklist for On Site Events:
Engraving drill (charge the night before)
Back up engraver
Burrs in different sizes and back up
Collet reducer if needed
Drafting pens and pencils
Alcohol, wipes, cotton pads, qtips
Rub and buff (silver, gold)
Post its or small intake forms
Branding sign
Business cards
Container to hold rub and buff, cotton pads, etc
Samples of bottles to clients can see personal style
Portable light
Phone mount for videos/content
Personal makeup kit (lip gloss, hairties/clips, contacts, gum, headache meds)
water/snacks
Washi tape
Small bag for trash
Drafting pens or pencils
cushion